She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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