that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
