i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
