I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
