yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize