Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
