we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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