summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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