I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
