so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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