I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
