Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
