Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
i drank out of a bidet.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
