I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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