Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
