Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(334): View more from Alabama

babies were throwing up all over the place

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(647): View more from Ontario

You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.

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(254): View more from Texas

just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.

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(270): View more from Kentucky

The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...

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(773): View more from Illinois

Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are

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(928): View more from Arizona

If this party got busted it would be an improvement

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(216): View more from Ohio

I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.

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(808): View more from Hawaii

There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE

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