so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize