please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
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