did you get engaged???
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
