that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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