Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
