Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize