My balls are so social today.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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