i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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