On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize