He had one of those small greek statue penises
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
