OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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