I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
