dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
i just google imaged poop.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize