Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
