I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
