Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Randomize
