I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
My vagina just recognized that song.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize