I think I am morally bankrupt
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Randomize
