And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
You smell like stripper and shame
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
