idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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