Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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