Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
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