He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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