Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
