your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
