He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
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