physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
