she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
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