toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Randomize
