Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
