thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Randomize
