i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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