Just mADE A PArabola og urine
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
