he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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