talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
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