I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
